Monday, my horoscope read: Enjoy the outdoors - even if the weather is not what you expected. You mustn't let such uncontrollable forces control you. Now, I don't normally read my horoscope, but I did Monday because I spent part of my morning on a commuter metro car from West Falls Church to Metro Center during rush hour, packed in, butt-cheek to butt-cheek with fellow passangers, my nose buried in a Post Express, which I read from cover to cover to avoid having to look up at the woman standing directly in front of me. How did things come to this? Good question. I'll get there in a minute . . .

But first, the trip to Vegas (the one I took this weekend, not the one I took 10 years ago) was a lot of fun. We met Catherine's family in Vegas for her sister's 21st birthday. As is proper in Vegas, I slept very little, drank mightily, and gambled heartily. We stayed at the MGM Grand. We ate some great food, saw an incredible Cirque du Soleil show called Ka (which I highly recommend) and played a decent two nights of black jack in which there were several ups and downs, but we ultimately came out $50 ahead.

These pics tell part of the story - the part where it was appropriate to have a camera.

So I was already running on minimal sleep for the weekend when Sunday evening rolled around and I boarded a flight from Las Vegas to Los Angeles, where I would take a second flight to DC, arriving around 5:30 am local time. Catherine had to go to Kansas City for business, and we had parted ways in Las Vegas. I was sad to be traveling alone, but I didn't know how sad I would be until the next morning when I arrived.

The trip was destined to have a snag.

I had managed to avoid two potential pitfalls, which gave me a false sense of security. First, on the flight to Los Angeles, a snooty flight attendant threatened to gate-check one of my bags. The same thing had happened on the way from DC to Vegas. TED is a bit trigger happy about checking bags. They don't even let you take it down to the plane to see if there is still space available. They will just tell you at the gate that the overhead area is all filled up and that you need to check it. I knew a gate-check would end badly for me since I would be changing planes in LAX. If they checked the bag to IAD, I figured it would get lost. And if they checked it to LAX, I would have to exit the terminal in Los Angeles, pick up my bag, and then go through security again. I begged and pleaded with the attendant and was allowed to 'take my chances' in finding an overhead space for my bag on the plane. As it turned out, when I got on the plane, I saw at least three spaces for my bag, one which was directly above my friggin' seat! This really annoyed me. A tip: if you're on a TED flight and they try to gate-check your bag before you even get on board, insist that you'd like to take your chances in bringing it on. Both times this happened to me, there were spaces available when I got on the plane.

So I had dodged one bullet, but found another waiting for me at LAX. There was a group of high-school kids going on a field trip to our nation's capital. Yes, tourist season is in bloom in DC. For the past few weeks, I've noticed groups of kids walking around the city. Now I faced the terrifying prospect of being trapped in an enclosed space for 5 hours with one of them. Actually, I'm not sure if these kids were high-schoolers, or if they had just escaped from a maximum security prison. It was hard to tell. I just hoped I didn't end up in prison as a result of the flight. Fourty to fifty angst ridden teens on a red-eye flight from LAX to DC? Who had thought this was a good idea? I figured I would end up seated right smack in the middle of the group and I could not be held responsible for my actions. I needed to know who to blame when I was put before the judge for passing out kool-aid laced with dangerous levels of Xanax.

The group of kids wound up seated in one area of the plane, to themselves. I was far in back of them, seated next to a man who only spoke Chinese and who slept most of the way. Amazingly, I was able to sleep for most of the trip. Bullet number two dodged.
When I de-planed at Dulles airport, it appeared that all was good. Now, I would just pick up the car, which was in the remote lot, head home, get some more sleep, and hopefully feel better by the afternoon. It was a surprisingly cool morning in DC - 40 degrees - but it was nice and sunny. Maybe I would try to do something outdoors! (I had yet to read my horoscope, mind you.) The shuttle dropped me off in the Green lot, and that's when it hit me. Catherine had driven to the airport. Not me. I had NOT driven to the airport. Instead of me, it was Catherine who drove. As you can see, my brain slowed down to single-processor mode in an effort to fully grasp the lamentable reality of this situation. Since I had not driven, it meant I did not have the key. Since Catherine had driven, she would, ipso facto, have the key. In Kansas City. It was starting to make sense in my head. Still, in an act of desperation, my brain told my hand to go ahead and reach in my pocket anyway. My hand only laughed as it found a few spare coins. No key. Silly brain. No key here. But you knew that, didn't you? You were only playing, right? My brain would not be put off that easily. It told my hands to unzip the outer compartment of my suit case. This is futile, said my hands. It is not there, you idiot. Stop this right now. My hands found keys, but they were my house keys, no car key. See? You better start thinking of an alternative! The bus was rounding a corner at the far end of the parking lot and heading back in my direction. I ran to catch it before it went back to the airport. When I got back on the bus, I got some funny looks from the people inside. I started to say something, started to tell them about my situation. But I didn't want their sympathy. I just wanted to sleep. I knew if I said anything it would probably be something sarcastic. So I just kept my mouth shut.

I suppose I should look on the bright side: I found two alternate low-cost ways to get to and from Dulles Airport from downtown. This is good to know for anybody who normally avoids Dulles because of the parking or ground transportation expense.

Option 1: Washington Flyer has a shuttle that runs from the airport to Falls Church West every half hour on the 15 and 45. It's $9 bucks or $16 round-trip (they've added a $1 fuel surcharge to the normal rate). It's pretty convenient and relatively inexpensive. Still, after you pay $16 round trip, plus metro fare, you might be spending as much as $24 using this method. I got a one-way ticket and figured I might try option 2 for coming back to pick up the car later in the day.

Option 2: Metro has a bus (the 5A) which runs every hour and has five stops, including Dulles. The others are: L'Enfant Plaza, Rossyln, Tysons Westpark Transit station, and Herndon-Monroe Park & Ride. I took this bus back to the airport to pick up my car later in the afternoon after having a nap. The total fare, including metro ride to Rosslyn, was $3.65. So for under $9, it's relatively easy to get to and from Dulles, as long as your flight falls within the hours when the bus runs. (The first bus leaves each end around 5:30 am and the last bus leaves around 10:30 pm.) The bus is larger and more comfortable than most metro buses and even has luggage space overhead. Total trip time was about an hour, which is probably a little faster than driving, parking, and taking the shuttle from the parking lot to the airport.

So yeah, true to my horoscope, I spent most of Monday outdoors, taking various forms of public transportation. And while the weather was better than I could have expected, the circumstances that led to my time outdoors were certainly 'out of my control.' Still, I think I made the best of it.

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