New Content and Feeds (Self-Medicating Optional)

Monday, December 08, 2008 | comments (6)
I've got a Tumblr blog and a few new content feeds, which I wanted to tell you about.

But first, if you've been reading this blog for a while, I have to take a moment to ask: Are you okay?

Would you like some aspirin? A drink?

A few Xanax?

Jesus.

Some of this shit has been pretty depressing lately. Maybe you should try reading something more uplifting, like the ASPCA Web site.

Or maybe not. Maybe you like it this way. In which case, I applaud you. For knowing what you like. Bravo. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Now, about the feeds: Many of you arrive here via RSS feed these days. So I finally came to the conclusion that instead of bringing any and all content streams here to this blog, it made much more sense to keep nicolasix separate, and direct its content—and all other content streams—into one separate RSS feed. So, for those who like the feed option, you can continue to only read the nicoalsix feed if you like, or you can also subscribe separately to other content (like my Twitter feed, for instance, or the new Tumblr feed — they're all listed up top when you click the RSS icon.) Or, and this is the main point of this post, if you're a glutton for punishment, you can simply subscribe to the master feed, where any content I ever create, now or in the future, even if I write it from some other planet, will be aggregated and served up via RSS. Even if nicolasix dies, whatever other content I may have will magically appear there. You won't ever have to subscribe to another feed from me. Ever! How great is that? Thank you, Yahoo Pipes, for making my Web 2.0 self-publishing pipe dreams a reality.

Okay, that's out of the way, now a note about the Tumblr blog, Looky, Looky!. Tumblr has let me get back to blog basics. I can just post random things here with no regard to theme or context. I find this lack of forethought freeing. According to some, it's what blogging is all about. I don't know if I believe that, but if it's true, I guess that makes my Tumblr blog a real blog's blog. I don't know what that means, but it sounds good, doesn't it? (See, it's working!)

Okay. That is all. Thanks for reading. I'm happy you're here. And if you still want that drink and Xanax, let me know.

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I'm Thankful for the Bad Dreams

Tuesday, December 02, 2008 | comments (3)
My hands are dry and cracked and bruised. When I bend the index finger of my right hand, sometimes the knuckle splits and bleeds. I think this is the way my hands should be. They are more interesting this way. They remind me that they've done things. And that they have purpose. And during morning walks, I sometimes keep my gloves in my pocket and wrap the leash around my bare hand and let my skin go numb in the bitter air to help the process along.

Right now, Honey is asleep beside me. Sometimes she barks at the things in her dreams. I wonder what these things are, and if they have names like "Daddy" and "Kong," or if her dreams are filled with monsters and ominous knocks on doors and garage doors opening. When Honey's not asleep, she's frighteningly awake. And when it's cold, she prays to a god called "The Space-Heater." She says one Hail Mary and three Our Fathers. She also farts.

My chest burns from Sambuca intake. Then it subsides. Then I wait. And I swallow again. And it burns some more. Sometimes, on a Saturday night, this is the cycle of things.

There is usually a call I do not want to make. Usually, I make it anyway.

Last week, C gave me two of the best birthday presents I've ever received. I watched one of them Friday night and it made me glad to be alive. I will listen to WNYC through the other present this week. And it will be good. Pretty much as good as it gets.

I used to figure life was something I was working towards. That it was full of good intention and determination and grand purpose. The thing about that—the thing about believing in a life's purpose—is you have to accept the fact that maybe it already happened. And you missed it.

When I go to sleep, I hope that I will dream. Usually, I do not. When I do, the dreams are usually bad. I'm thankful anyway.

I'm never too sure what a particular day will bring. But I'm always quite sure it won't bring anything resembling wonder, or awe, or any other thing I used to feel before thirty. Maybe I've forgotten how to be a kid. Maybe I need to stop making friends with the people on the radio. Or maybe I just spend too much time looking at my hands.

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