Display by Label: Work

One thing you learn when you're self-employed and working from home is that it is entirely possible to wear the same brown, zip-in-the-front sweater every day for two weeks straight and not offend anybody. Not even yourself. Oh, you still change the t-shirt underneath, of course. On a daily basis. Because you're no animal, after all. But the sweater? The jeans? The footwear? Why change them? Who are you trying to impress? The mail carrier? Who is she to judge? She wears the same thing everyday, too. The bottom line is nobody knows. Because all of your "face-to-face" conversations take place via the phone, and while you have a very real appearance to yourself in the mirror, your appearance to the five people conferencing with you on a Friday morning at 8 am from different parts of the US is completely imaginary. To these people, your state is forever fixed in their consciousness, and you are always, at any given time, sitting in front of your computer, beneath an array of florescent lighting, wearing business casual, and sipping from a coffee mug that says, I hate Mondays or You want it when?! They don't know that only seconds ago you were putting the garbage out and that currently you're lying on your back doing some stretches on the berber carpet in your spare room while they go on about whether or not the icon looks better on the right or left, or if a certain word or phrase requires quotation marks around it. And you probably should care about these things. But you don't. And now you're throwing a squishy ball at the ceiling. Or watching the Obama speech in Philly (muted of course). Or applying some apricot jam to a gluten-free biscuit which you made earlier that morning. And suddenly you come to your senses and realize that—god-dammit—all this time you've been on this call, and your coffee cup has been empty. So you place it in your palm and weigh it there and regard its cold, vacant interior with sadness, and then you shuffle into the kitchen to make another cappuccino while the voices continue through your earpiece. And in the kitchen, you mute the phone, and you use this time you have to yourself to reflect upon your life and contemplate the finer details of this existence you've chosen. And, in that moment, it occurs to you that perhaps you've grown unhealthily attached to your blue, paint-speckled crocs. Because you actually noticed this morning that you felt uneasy and scared at the thought of putting on real shoes. And your reluctance to take off those crocs to do the normal things people do—like shower, or sleep—could be an indication that things are getting a little out of control. And, okay, you do take them off for those activities. But you have a suspicion it's only because your wife is there. And you don't want to alarm her.

And while the espresso machine pushes the silky brown stuff into your cup and your phone is on mute and the people on the other end are continuing to talk and talk, you gaze outside. And you realize that it's quickly becoming spring out there. And pretty soon you're going to need to get that lawn thing figured out. Because where you come from, men take their lawns seriously. And there's this whole business of laying down mulch and, well, when exactly should that happen? And then there's the lawnmower you need to purchase. And the trimmer. And probably a leaf-blower would be useful—even now, even in spring—to get rid of the leftovers from last year that are under your deck. And come to think of it, you should really get a rake. And some fertilizer and a fertilizer application device. And you'll store all of this in the empty shed out back. Or rather, the shed you hope is empty. Because you've yet to look inside of it. And that's probably something you should have done by now. But every time you've thought to do it, there's been a river of ice or water between your house and it. And so you've figured it's not going anywhere, and you'll take a look inside when the time comes. And maybe now that time has come. Because you do live in Soprano country. And sheds are great places to store a great many things, not just lawn equipment. And the more you think about it, the more daunting it seems. And maybe it's best to just keep it closed up. And to not deal with it. And maybe somehow spring won't actually come this year. And the lawn won't grow. And you can just keep the shed empty—in your mind.

And just then a question comes your way from over the phone line, interrupting your quiet lawn musings. It seems your opinion is requested. So you de-mute. And you tell the phone—and hopefully the people on the other end of it—what you think. And there's no response, and you realize that people aren't picking up what you're laying down. And it's not even that what you said was all that technical. It's just that you're the "technical guy," and people's eyes tend to glaze over and their ears go all deaf when you start uttering phrases. Because even though it's these people's jobs to deal with things like Web sites, and to sit on committees to help populate them with content, they refuse to learn the language necessary to talk about them in any meaningful way. And so you find yourself using words and speaking in tongues that you haven't used since 2001. And that whole plea of "I'm not that tech savvy, so you'll need to explain this to me in laymen's terms" is one you've heard uttered hundreds of times, but this particular time, you want to reach through the phone and shake them and say, "All I'm talking about here is an email form and when you click "submit" it emails the information you entered to another person! I'm not asking you to program the thing, just to imagine it on the site!" And you consider asking this person if not knowing how to bake bread from scratch or slaughter a pig means they don't know how to talk about a ham sandwich. But then you think better of it and you patiently repeat what you said in a different way. And there's a silent pause and then somebody suggests that we get Bob on the phone. Because Bob is technical. And he'll understand. He'll understand the concept of ... an email form. But you don't get upset, because you've had this conversation before, a million times actually, and chances are, at the rate you're going, you'll have it again. And so you take a sip of your coffee beverage and you eye the Dewars and wonder if 8:30 in the morning is too early for "Happy Hour."

If you look closely at the backyard of your soul, you'll find a shed. And it's something you've gazed at a million times before and it's always remained closed and mysterious. And surrounded by ice. Familiar, but strange. Holding so much promise, but surrounded by challenge and danger. You think you may have a key to it somewhere, but you're not really sure where it is, and even if you found it, you're not sure you want to know what's inside. Because it could be something you're not ready to find, and then you'll have to deal with whatever it is that's in there. And if there's nothing? If it's empty? An entirely different problem. The potential to do the wrong thing, or worse, to do the right thing poorly. And so even though the ice is melting and the opportunity is ripe to go out and see what you can do in this new place, the temptation is to stay in these other rooms you've occupied, and walk in your crocs in the well-worn paths that connect one room to the other. Until you wake up one morning and realize that safe is another word for dead. And pretty soon there'll be a lawn growing around you whether you want it to or not.

Rebirth. Renewal. It's happening, brother. And you're missing it. And another couple years of this and you'll be in the weeds. And you won't even be able to see the shed. And the other paths will be that much more worn. And it's only going to get harder to tread someplace new.

And it's time, brother—it's time to figure this thing out.

So you hang up from your call and you go upstairs and you put on a different sweater. Because you have to start somewhere. And tomorrow maybe you'll take on the shed.

link to this | comments (7) | File:  Weather  Chewing  Work 

A clever post on the 12 Breeds of Clients.

link to this | comments (0) | File:  Work 

I intended this post to be a somewhat thoughtful reflection on the past year, and possibly a statement of resolutions for the coming one. I also intended to post a photo album or two from the holidays. But this was last week - before The Fall. And what is it they say? Something about best-laid plans of mice and men? I'm surely one of those.

It started last Thursday when I came back from the gym to find my PC had gone to a black screen, upon which the words 'Non-system disk error' were written, innocently enough, at the top left. I tried rebooting. It took about 25 minutes. Excruciating. Gnashing of teeth. Biting of nails. Windows finally came back up, only to generate further cryptic errors like this one. Then it blue screened. I did some fancy windows ninja tricks - stopped unnecessary services from running, rebooted into safe mode, restored to a previous state. But no matter what I tried, the results were pretty much the same. Painfully slow processing followed by abrupt system failure.

Data loss was not a concern. Thanks to the backup routine I began last Spring, I had a fresh backup of all my files. Hardware and support costs? No worries there either. As luck would have it, I'm on the last month of a three-year extended warranty from HP. The timing really couldn't be better, in that sense.

But lost time and productivity? This may be a problem. I've already spent a few hours on the phone with HP trying various troubleshooting methods, all of which I was fairly certain would not work even as they were being offered to me. I think what this comes down to is a hard drive failure. I'm not sure what gave it away. Probably the scratching and grinding noises which began the morning of that first breakdown. Today, I can't even boot into windows anymore, but while I still could, the error logs read 'disk error' and 'atapi error,' both of which seemed to point to a disk problem. And when I tried to run a disk check outside of windows, it told me the drive 'did not support it,' which doesn't even make sense. But I guess all those clues are code for 'You need to try to re-install windows,' which is what the HP support staff recommends I do. They're sending me updated system disks in the mail. My guess is shortly after I try those, HP will be sending me a new hard drive. But I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. I'm willing to go through the troubleshooting process. In the meantime, however, I've got two active Web projects and a couple of other pending ones and no computer with the right software on it to do the work. That's got me a little on edge. Just a little.

Now, I'll probably get the windows laptop back up and running eventually, but I decided that, despite this, I needed to heed the signs being hailed at me by the quarterbacks of computing: It's time for a change. Damn all the uncertainty. Damn the new software I'll have to buy. It's time to take the plunge. It's time to switch to a Mac.

So last Saturday night, on the brink of a new year and all the promise and anticipation a time like this holds, I ordered a MacBook Pro. And come Thursday, I'll be a part of the family. I'll be able to play with the cool kids. And thanks to Parallels, I'll still be able to drink the Redmond kool-aid from time to time, if I really really really need to, which I might just have to do so I can use my favorite photo application, at least until Google wises up and makes a Mac version.

As some of you know, I've been wanting to go Mac for a while, and had always prepared to do it right around this time, anyway. We bought an iBook last February, which C uses, and I've been envious of her OS X tricks ever since. But as the time approached, I began to get cold feet and I wound up ordering this. Then, despite my best attempts to sabotage the effort, I managed to send it back because it really wasn't what I wanted. Now I'm following through with the original plan - get a Mac - and it feels good. But there's still a lot of work to do: Configurations to implement. Files to convert. Lots of exporting and importing. New software to order and install. New shortcuts and work-flows to learn. When your entire life is in digital, switching platforms is no easy task. There'll be a period of dust and noise around here, which I hope you will excuse. But when it's all over, I should come out on the other side renewed, reborn. And at the start of a new year, what more can you ask for?

link to this | comments (7) | File:  Mac  Tech  Work 

On the way to Dallas I met an older guy who was heading to Puerto Vallarta with his wife for the holidays. Evidently, when you're retired you can do that sort of thing.

We exchanged opinions about which DC-area airport is the best (DCA), which airline has the most legroom (American), and places to go in Texas (there's only one - Austin).

Anyway, I immediately liked him because he had a way with language. At one point, he told me that he used to 'drive truck' for a living. I had never heard this profession put this way - as an action. In singular. He didn't say, 'I was a truck driver' or 'I drove trucks.' It was 'drive truck.' Right on. I got you, brother. I used to give a similar response my first three years out of college: 'I tend bar.' For some reason I didn't like saying, 'I'm a bartender.' Because in the end, are we ever just that? I hate being identified by my job. It's much better to state your profession as an action - as something that you do. Not something that you are.

So from now on, I develop web. Oh, and write nonsense. Kinda makes me wish I were a heart surgeon. Then I would fix heart.

What do you do?

link to this | comments (13) | File:  Ho_Hum  Work 

Some good things to remember when building standards- and css-friendly sites, whether you're a pro at css or just breaking away from tables.

link to this | comments (0) | File:  Code  CSS  Web  Work 

I've been extra techie-minded lately. Basking (or floundering) in my nerdishness, depending on how you view it. One of the fun (or frustrating) things about being a Web developer, again depending on your view, is that there are always new tools, new ideas, new ways of doing things coming out. And sometimes it isn't so much that these things are 'new' as it is that people are applying older ideas in new and interesting ways. Voilá Web 2.0! Sometimes they make you stop what you're doing and say, 'Hey, I need to check this out.'

Now, this isn't a tech blog, and I'm pretty much a techie-imposter anyway, so I definitely won't try to make it one, but I thought I'd highlight a couple of neat things I've been playing with lately.

1) There has been quite a stir in the developer community about the upcoming release of the IE7 Web browser and the effect it's going to have on existing page designs, particularly ones that are CSS-heavy. I've been wanting to download the beta to experiment, but since doing so would replace the existing version of IE on my machine (in typical MS loveliness), preventing me from being able to test in IE 6, I have refrained. Until the other day when I remembered I had an old laptop under the bed, not doing anything. Polly. The laptop's name is Polly, and it used to be Catherine's. So I booted her up (Polly, that is, not Catherine) and (after resetting the system clock) she still worked, though she's got a fan in her that's loud as hell. Anyway, I downloaded the IE7 beta onto her and have been playing around. Honestly, it's not as kinky as it sounds.

For the most part, the new IE is good. It has a lot of the same functionality as Firefox, which is a positive step forward, but it still lacks all the Firefox charm. It definitely seems to handle CSS more faithfully, which is good. I have found a few display problems in some of my pages, but they're probably the result of prior hacks I had used to get things to display properly in the old IE. I'll have to look into that a little more.

2) I've also been playing around with some stuff I found on script.aculo.us (link via Sixfoot6 - thanks!). The code is easy to implement, cross-browser compatible, and allows you to make some pretty neat usability tweaks, which have the added advantage of looking very cool. I don't have any examples to show yet, but after some initial playing around, I've already thought of a few ways I can put it to good use.

So there you have it: the exciting life and times of yours truly. One of these days, I will get back to telling stories and thinking about things other than Web development, but for now this stuff is kind of at the forefront of my brain.

Oh, one other thing: I had to cancel my trip for this year's men-only fishing trip because there's just too much going on right now and I got kind of behind after my trip to Texas. Do I feel less manly for backing out? Yes, dammit.

link to this | comments (4) | File:  Work  Web_Design  Tech  IE7  CSS 

Last Friday was my last day at my job of 5 1/2 years. It really began to sink in as I packed up my work computer and shipped it off to Austin where it would eventually find a new employee who will use it to maintain Web sites for the large non-profit that owns it. The machine is a Dell Optiplex G110 Pentium III 933 Mhz with 512 MB of RAM - a bit worn around the edges, but still chugging along, now on its third hard drive. I have to admit I got a little choked up as I put it in the box. Not so much out of sentimentality as out of physical exertion: I had forgotten how heavy the damn thing was! Computers, like everything else, have definitely gotten lighter over the past 5 years.

So I've come to the conclusion that the stars must be aligned for positive life changes. Aside from my recent move away from my full-time job to embark on a journey of self-employment and, in the process, re-discover my more literary side, a friend of mine here in DC just found out yesterday that his book will be published by Random House! And to add a little icing to an already sweet deal, Dreamworks also bought the movie rights. This is a definite inspiration to me as I get started writing again. It gives me hope that it really can be done, that some dreams come true. At the same time, it makes me feel a bit intimidated and defeated before I've even begun. I mean, published by Random House, with the possibility of a movie. It's kind of hard to stand tall in the shadow of that achievement! The odds of being published or knowing somebody that has been published are pretty slim as it is, so how bad do those odds get when you have a friend do it who lives within the same 5-mile radius? I'm trying not to think about it. Of course, I could look at it another way: success breeds more success. It's definitely going to be nice to have somebody to bounce ideas off of who has already been through the whole novel writing/publishing experience . . . and come out on top!

So things are going well for my friend on the literary front, and hopefully that will wear off on me a little bit. But even if it doesn't, I've got other things to get excited about on the musical front. This weekend, The Jones jammed for the second time with Mat, and for the second time, we were blown away at how great things sounded with him driving the rhythm. I really feel like we all just clicked, and the music reflected that. With Mat drumming, Mike's songs take on a much more groovy/funky sound and this whole new world of possibilities suddenly seems within reach. We weren't sure if Mat would be able to play with The Jones since he already plays with another great band - Communist Bakesale. But as it turns out, he said this weekend that he was definitely up for having a go at doing both. I am so excited that we'll be playing with him I can hardly stand it. Everybody needs to get ready for a very new Jones sound on July 6th at DC9!

Finally, another bit of good news: after almost having to reschedule my upcoming trip to Houston due to various conflicts, the biggest conflict was worked out today and I'll be able to go after all. There are still some things that turned out to be bad timing with this trip - such as missing the Old 97s at the 9:30 Club, which I had already bought tickets to go see. But I just learned today that Sarah and Oytun will be having a house warming during the weekend I'm in Dallas (the day of the Old 97s show, in fact) so I've traded one misfortune for a bit of happy times with friends. A pretty good trade, I think.

link to this | comments (2) | File:  Friends  Music  Work 

I've been doing some brainstorming on what to call my web consulting business. Here's what I've come up with so far. One of them is a little more 'creative' than the others, but I'm not really sure if creative is more important than just a good solid name that describes what I do and who I am. Let me know your impressions of these - like 'em, hate 'em - and feel free to add any others that come to mind. Thanks! Comment away!

link to this | comments (3) | File:  Work 

Co-Worker: I wanted to talk to you about the online reporting tools we have for accessing profile information

Me: Okay. The ones I sent you detailed instructions for last month?

Co-Worker: Right. Those. I . . . wanted to see if we could streamline the process at all.

Me: (Pause.) Hmm . . . I'm not sure what you mean by . . . streamline.

(Aside to self: But I have a sneaking suspicion it means 'do it for me.')

Co-Worker: I mean, right now it seems kind of complicated.

Me: Have you tried running a report yet?

Co-Worker: Well, not exactly. I did get your instructions, though. I should have them somewhere. Remind me again: did you send them to my email?

Me: Um . . . yes.

Co-Worker: Okay, then I'm sure I have them. I'm just . . . well . . . I guess what I'm wondering . . . do you think running these reports . . . I mean do you feel this might be . . . I mean . . . something that you should do.

Me: (Pause, breathe) Hmm . . . let me think about that, (name withheld). I'd have to answer in the negative to that one. You see, the tools have been designed under the foolish assumption that it would be good to empower users to run their own reports so that we don't waste money having 'technical' people act as secretaries to those with a fear of technology. They enable you to pull whatever information you need and then download it as an Excel spreadsheet. Excel, just so you know, is this silly little program which has been used widely in offices since early in the last decade.

Co-Worker: Huh. Well, it just seems like a lot of work to do, having to go into the system and run these reports.

Me: Well, yes. I suppose it does involve some deliberate will to action and just a smidge of physical exertion, mainly in the wrist and fingers. But I wouldn't call it a lot of 'work.' It's pretty simple, actually, and, all kidding aside, I'm happy to walk you through it, but it sounds like you haven't even tried yet.

Co-Worker: Well, I uh . . . well, that should be good . . . I guess . . . I guess it would just be nice to not have to go in and . . .

Me: . . . run the report? I agree: that would be nice. It would also be 'nice' if I typed your emails for you and held the phone to your head while you spoke into it.

Co-Worker: (Silence.)

Me: (Silence.)

Co-Worker: Well, I'll go ahead and read through your instructions and let you know if I have any questions.

Me: Sounds like a good idea.

Co-Worker: Have a great afternoon.

Me: You too. Buh-bye.

I'm obviously a little 'on edge' today . . . two more weeks. That's it.

link to this | comments (4) | File:  Work 

Today I resigned from the job where I have been for the last 5 1/2 years in order to write and do my own business full-time. My last day will be May 27th. Right now, I'm feeling a strange mixture of excitement and sadness. Mainly, I'm excited to be embarking on this new path. I mean, I am a little scared at the same time - a little fearful of what lies ahead. But deep down I know I can make it work. I just have to 'get in the game.'

What's disturbing is this sense of sadness that's begun to creep up on me this afternoon. This lump in my throat that begins to well up when I draft another email or do some everyday routine task. It's a sense of loss, really. It's probably natural to feel this way. I mean, when you think about it, I've been a part of this same community of people for the last 5 1/2 years of my life. How could I not feel sadness at leaving it? During my time here, there have been some really great moments and there have also been some really low moments, both at work and in my personal life. But through all those times, there was always the constant sense of security that comes from having a regular job - a place where I know certain things and can perform certain tasks . . . and do so with certainty. It's a sad thing to leave that kind of familiarity. I've felt this way before and, though it's a strange analogy to make, it's very much like leaving behind a close friend or loved one. Even if you know it's the best thing for you, leaving someplace or somebody that feels like 'home' is always hard to do.

Deciding to leave this job was one of the hardest things I've done in a long time. But overall, I know it's a step in the right direction. Instead of feeling sad at what I'm leaving behind, I'm going to opt to feel happy and grateful for the things I've learned over the past several years and for the memories (and friendships) I can take with me.

link to this | comments (1) | File:  Work